(for the first time I published the post on the day of love Valentine's Day 2008. It took me three years to give him a below).
There are animals whose love affair takes the fleeting time of mating, and others on the contrary are bound to form a family that would last a lifetime. Homo sapiens belongs (or belonged?) To the second category: the period of adolescence, spent experimenting with relationships to the opposite sex, through falling in love to find a partner to start a family, to have children, grow and eventually grow old together. In the practical application of this model presents difficulties from the start, at the stage where in love with a person, we realize with amazement that she is not in love with us. What is the mechanism that triggers our emotional and erotic interest to the other is a mystery to us, and maybe even rightly so; But it's really a shame that the joy we feel total embarking on a love story touches us so seldom, while the opposite is the disappointment we dispensed with both hands.
Find the person who parts, one that makes your heart and whose heart beats for us is long, difficult, and some never succeed. So once you find the love we should show gratitude to the heavens so as to partners, but almost always not the case. Spent the days of the honeymoon, the passion burning, of falling, those in which the voice and the sight of the beloved make us wince, those days when you never stop kissing, the report takes the path of least peaceful and stable and solid foundation of daily life.
It is here that comes into play ' infidelity.
Certainly, a person can be absolutely unfaithful from the start, by her boyfriend, and at this stage may be more tolerated by the partner, because we know that the engagement means less exclusive obligations of marriage. The lover who discovers the infidelity of her boyfriend is more inclined to forgive, because imagine having to redouble their efforts to conquer it, or because you still lulled by the eternal illusion of seeing change in the future.
Read my lips: the sooner the better! Thank the heavens have discovered that you love and let an infidel all'istatnte, now that you're on time, because of two things: either there is an infidel like or serial. Not only will not change but you can be assured that you will ruin your life.
The large amount of damage it causes infidelity when it happens within marriage. You say many negative things about marriage, the kind that is the tomb of love or a prison, a hell pink (© Mogol) but actually marry the right person is a wonderful thing. Gone are the days of hunting in the wind and rain, greedy for happiness in this world, two people who love each (plus their children) may seek to build with his hands in his own lair a Private Paradise on earth. But hardly a marriage survive an infidelity, infidelity is discovered and as always, choose to be unfaithful is to choose to be alone. Unfortunately the same applies to the victim of infidelity, which has had no opportunity to choose.
Let's face it, the emotion of sex and love to all, and no one gives out their own occasional fling at the same weight as that suffered infidelity. Many men do not even consider paying a sexual infidelity, because it is something that does not involve the sphere of feelings, the theory is that if your partner does not take away even an ounce of love, not without an extra vent about anything. Unless you're talking about a whore who loves to exercise instead of the mercenary sex marriage. I think many men would tolerate even that his wife had a sexual relationship with a man paid (imagine the situation of a very thorough bachelor party) if it were absolutely casual.
Being unfaithful involves a certain degree of predisposition to falsehood and deceit, for many of us to be unfaithful would be considered a job too stressful. First of all to be in the situation must be to betray a bit 'find it themselves, with availability showing the attitude and looking for opportunities to get into temptation.
L 'infidel by mistake, very occasionally, is what happens when a great opportunity that is really hard to say no. For example, a man to whom a work colleague makes a very attractive proposal absolutely explicit. Or a woman who finds herself skillfully courted by someone who, for love or sports, move back to her family after years of routine, the strings of the feminine sensibility: the pleasure of pleasure, to feel beautiful and desired. The occasional unfaithful is very much in big trouble: can not lie and is not capable of handling a situation illegal, nor really want to do it. At best, you will discover from the very first appointment, by paying a dear stressful situation that provided him with very few rewards. In the worst (maybe not) ends up falling in love really lover and sends her marriage falling apart. Rather than a trespass in this case it is a mistake: a wrong marriage - and there are so many to enter this category. The occasion
infidelity is more common in certain categories of work, for example for those who travel extensively for work, who is rarely at home working alongside regular colleagues, who is often in business meetings out of town. The defenses are lowered, the situation is favorable, the opportunity is at hand, rather, of room. It is known that the convention in hotels are often turned into bacchanalian night even more school trips for teenagers.
There is a second category of infidel, but it is rare. It is the forced sex, is the oversexed person, often male, who lives every day in the key state of desire to mate. There are fewer than those who millantino, and often are not true believers: the hypersexuality is often experienced by the couple, who eventually choose to live eroticism so enlarged. These are the swingers Those who attend special club and unsuspected orgies. Does not constitute infidelity because it involves the betrayal of infidelity, that is doing something without the knowledge of partners and to their detriment.
The real enemy of marriage and of the human race is the 'serial unfaithful. The serial infidel is a cyborg, a replica that resembles in appearance in every detail of a human being, but that is not. Mixes with human beings, it mimics the behavior and emotions, including love and values \u200b\u200bgenerally, but it is a hoax. The serial infidel does not feel really like any other people: like his colleague the serial killer, is not capable of empathy, sympathy for other people, which often feels inferior and therefore entitled to credit and therefore prey. He can not enter the minds and feelings of those around him, and his love is never much more than mimicry acquired through experience. The serial is unfaithful
normally upstart, arrogant, always absolutely false and bogus, because for him the "truth" is just one way of relating to others to get something and not an ethical value to be respected. It is hedonistic, pleasure seeking, even if it is often unable to really grasp it and maybe get to help with additives such as cocaine, drugs hedonistic par excellence. The woman nymphomaniac eg anorgasmia and is frequently (though not in the category of traders) infidel. The infidel is a professional serial lies, deception and make-up, knows every trick, from the phone silent commitment to work and do not take into chestnut with a receipt or a bill in the forgotten pockets. The serial does not like very unfaithful. Even if it is able to assemble parallel stories that may take months or years, when he was discovered does not change the adulterous relationship in a true love story, despite the words he has spent plenty of deception of his courtship ( Talk Is Cheap: talk does not cost anything). The clandestine relationship ceases to exist the moment they are exposed to sunlight.
Further evidence of the incoherence of the infidel social serial is jealousy. The most jealous people I met were unfailingly also infidels and deeply insecure. A normal person would consider fair compensation that the betrayed spouse betrays itself, and maybe it would also be raised. Not infrequently, long-time marriages that are based on a double infidelity not concerted but ultimately not investigated much less impaired.
In the balance of the universe is the antithesis of the infidel spouse betrayed. There are naturally predisposed to being betrayed partner. Meanwhile, it is true that infidelity about sixty percent of the reports, and that most marriages are destined to fail than those to last a lifetime, the safest way to expose themselves to betrayal ... is married. Should make to the church bulletin boards such as those on the motorway "two out of three marriages end in shit" or "two out of three married couples betray their spouses." Or : "one day your spouse will hate you" .
The betrayed spouse may be the most passive of the two, or more than love or more willing to tolerate for fear of losing their partner. Suspected but not verification of the evidence and takes to the lies of good traitor, when he does not even feel guilty at the expense of their self-esteem, in a downward spiral that only old age of sexual partner will end. It may be that the betrayed spouse is the "dominant" when it is so arrogant and blinded by your ego to neglect the needs of partners and not even take into account the possibility of being cheated - and therefore as such not a jealous, until devastating moment of truth.
Treason is the ugliest word in the vocabulary, because means that the person you love is what we should do more harm to the world. A treacherous enemy without remorse sleeping next to his victim unconscious. It is also the word that does more damage, because the majority of marriages do not survive the betrayal. Betrayal destroys, which is the opposite of build, build, and if takes time, love, dedication, commitment and luck, to destroy it takes a while. The traitor
more or less consciously surrender to the joy of love, of living together and aging together to swap an empty future, a little 'about sex a lot of smuggling and loneliness.
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